Indigo Feed #2: The Leaving

Glya and I made disparate love last night. An act of disconnection. Pantil slept in her room.
Afterward, we walked naked to the kitchen together, our hands apart, and made beras on the stove.  We watched the steam whorls under the thin canister light and felt the dawn rise, proclaiming nothing.We looked up at each other. Her eyes, green and lost, abandoned me.

This would be easy if she hated me.

The silver shuttles seem silent beyond the broad terminal windows. Workers, small beneath the shuttles' bulk, are choreographed to the music of the daily launch cycle.  Around them, slow huffing steam condenses in the morning cold, coalescing into cumulus pillars then dissolving.

"NOW BOARDING orbital shuttle 0010 to L4"

My call.

I sit alone with only my small bag of things I cannot buy. I peel open the seal. Pantil looks up at me, her face painted by her hand. A self-portrait in tangible pigment on stiff clothboard. The smell of her hugs my coat.

I gather my things and stand. There are few others here for the early launches. I signal a passing cart and it tumbles over, perfunctory. I select breakfast. Another patron steps up and waits for me to finish. We glance at each other and nod. Her eyes are dark and her coat smells of Indigo.

I leave her at the cart and move along the terminal to the boarding area. A cluster of citizens gather and the screens over the gate snap on. A smiling, ethnically neutral host appears, his welcome prattle lost in the buzz of families and business travelers. The host slickers off and a view of the departure anteroom appears. The families look up now, exclaiming and waving and throwing embraces at relatives and friends on the screen. The relatives and friends exclaim and wave and throw embraces back.

Glya left me at the receiving station and said she would not see me go. But there she was, her hand covering her face, with Pantil at her side, near the back of the crowd. Pantil saw me, tugged at her mother and pointed at the screen on their side. She launched her hand in the air, waved, then pointed to her node device. I will wait for your ping, father.


I waved back to Pantil, threw her an embrace and mouthed a silent "I love you" to them both. Glya, removing her hand, mouthed back, "I know."

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